If you want your children to be successful people, do not demand only good grades, better work on their emotions.
It is gratifying that our children get good grades, that they study and prepare better every day so that in the future they will be independent and successful people; Even all your efforts should be rewarded. But unfortunately, this does not guarantee that they have acquired knowledge and know how to apply it in everyday life.
More than a good grade, the most valuable thing is that children learn to develop their emotional intelligence. It is the best life tool that we can teach them, since it will make them strong, resilient and happy people, which will also allow them to achieve their goals more easily.
The lack of emotional intelligence causes children to grow up with resentments, fears, hatreds, complexes and pre-established beliefs, which cause them to take negative actions, hurting those around them.
As usual. Those children with underdeveloped emotional intelligence are problematic, ill-mannered, and angry children most of the time. This will make it difficult for them to socialize; and the worst thing is that they lose interest and motivation to learn.
Raising emotionally strong children
A investigationcarried out by Harvard experts, affirms that the challenge of the parents or guardians of their children is to make them develop empathy and compassion for others, this must be learned from childhood, so that when they grow up they are understanding, happy and have more success. By having better social relationships, you will be ready to achieve your desired goals.
For this reason, we must focus our attention on strengthening and teaching emotional intelligence, rather than demanding a good school grade ; since the most relevant thing is to make our children emotionally strong people; since the benefits that they will obtain will be many.
For example, they will have better self-esteem, greater self-control, mastery of emotions, until they obtain personal maturity, since they will reaffirm their identity and the ability to manage conflicts.
So I share some tips for you to start working with your children.
1 An immense variety of emotions
When they ask you, What are the emotions? You can say that they are sadness, joy, anger and fear; these are more common. But to help develop emotional intelligence in our children, we must teach them that there are a wide variety of emotions.
It will not be valid to say “I feel sad”, when you really feel melancholic or disappointed, or “I feel happy”, when in reality you feel satisfied and grateful.
Finding a reason why we act in a certain way, identifying our emotions, will make it easier to know the causes and origin. Since it is important to understand how they feel and why.
2 Preparing to beat them
Maybe you can think that all negative emotions are bad and that you have to eliminate them completely to be a successful person. However, you will be making a mistake, since repressing them will cause you not to obtain all the information possible to face any situation.
Therefore, teach your children that feeling fear, anger, sadness or disappointment are not bad feelings, on the contrary, acknowledging them will give them the tools to defend themselves and thus learn to resolve internal conflicts.
For example; If your little one is afraid of the dark, by recognizing their emotions you can find the source of their fear and thus work on it to strengthen their confidence and security in it.
3 Understanding others
Many times we can judge others without knowing the origin of their reactions, what is behind that emotion that has hurt you. Therefore, teach your children to ask themselves what emotions and thoughts that person may be experiencing?
In this way you will create more empathy and thus will strengthen their skills to relate to others.
4 Love and a lot of love
Children learn from the example they receive from their parents. How can a child be a good person if they do not feel loved and respected? To strengthen their emotional intelligence, we must love children, care for them, provide them with a stable and safe family environment, show affection, and respect their personalities.
When they feel loved, they will automatically be more secure, trusting people and will learn to love themselves, strengthening their self-esteem.
5 Make sure they hear and understand the messages
Parents are very given to establishing limits and rules for their children, so that they learn to behave and be good people; But when we impose something on them and give them an order, they usually won’t understand the correct message.
If it is time to sleep, explain the reasons why they should stick to a scheduleIf it’s time to do homework, explain the consequences of not doing it, among other things. The idea is to give clear, precise messages and without so much roll.
6 Solving difficulties
Trust your children’s abilities and intelligence, never underestimate them even if they are very young. If you give them the freedom to make decisions, to give an opinion, to solve their problems, you will be working on their emotional intelligence.
You can guide them, orient them, but never intervene in solving their conflicts; If you think they may be in danger, apply the previous point and give the right message so that they understand the why and the consequences of their actions.
7 Generators of positive changes
Helping those most in need and anyone in need is gratifying. Encourage your children to be generators of positive changes and to strengthen their values such as humility, generosity, respect and honesty.
8 Discovering new strengths
Your children must surely have many abilities and skills, so you should strengthen them and help them apply them in their daily lives; By doing so you will be training people with greater self-control and more responsible.
Also focus on working on those weaknesses so they never think they are not capable of doing such a thing.
In conclusion, grades are not as important as having good emotional intelligence. Put these tips into practice to ensure that your children are successful and happy in their adult lives.