No More Tantrums! Simple Tricks For Your Child To Control His Emotions

Apply these easy and simple tips to help your children develop their emotional intelligence.

When we are parents we know the need to establish limits and rules for our children so that they learn what is correct and what is not. But sometimes it is very complicated, since they tend to throw tantrums when something does not agree with them, or they disagree.

On more than one occasion, I remember that my son would do some enormously embarrassing shows when he got angry, he used to kick the air, hit the wall with his fists, yell, cry, throw himself on the floor and of course tell me that he hated me.

Of course, every time I did it, my heart instantly quivered, and I questioned the application of my rules, making me believe that I was very strict and authoritative.

I began to observe that his behaviors were not appropriate, as he exploited his emotions very easily and frequently. For a while, I stopped setting limits and let him do whatever he wanted, so I could control the situation momentarily. However, I realized that it was not the most appropriate and that I had to work to teach him to control his emotions and eradicate the problem at its roots.

How to start?

Specialists call it emotional intelligence. It is about understanding and knowing emotions. When we do not know how to control them, logically we are socially excluded, becoming misfits, frustrated and unhappy people.

For this reason, it is important to teach our children from a very young age to control their emotions, as well as to accept and obey the rules and limits that we impose; all this, thinking about their well-being and happiness in their adult life.

Detect the red spot

When children want to get the attention of their parents and are frustrated by having to follow these established rules, which they do not agree to, they often become easily irritated by becoming tantrum and irascible simply by not knowing how to control themselves.

You can detect aggressive behavior in your child’s daily life, such as: when there is rivalry between siblings, conflicts with friends, school situations, pressure exerted by peers and family life.

Apply emotional intelligence to your children

Maurice J. Elias author of “Educate with emotional intelligence”, proposes an easy and simple way to change children’s behavior, focusing on deep and rewarding communication, as well as the idea of ‚Äč‚Äčteaching them in a positive way.

I share some ideas:

1 Recognize emotions

There are an immense amount of emotions such as joy, happiness, anger, frustration, to name a few. Many of them are similar to each other. However, teaching the meaning of each of them, as well as the difference between the feelings that are experienced in different situations, will help to better understand emotions.

Put into practice 

Make a representation of feelings and emotions with your children in different contexts and daily problems. For example: fear and anguish are they the same? Use tools such as stories, drawings or stories where the protagonists go through happy or sad situations, and thus you can explain each emotion more easily.

2 Error does not equal frustration

We all tend to get frustrated when we make mistakes, so we act defensively. To reinforce emotional intelligence, it must be explained that mistakes are learning. By doing so, your children will be more tolerant of problems.

Put into practice 

Use positive phrases to strengthen your child’s self-esteem, security and confidence, such as: “You are very intelligent and I am sure you will find a solution.” It even uses games where your children have to face challenges or challenges such as puzzles, crosswords, and word search.

3 Discover the causes

It is important to teach how to channel emotions by discovering the origin. What was the cause of such emotion? Why do you feel angry or afraid? Generally, when we feel in danger or do not achieve desired goals, negative emotions explode.

Teach your children to discover the origin of their feelings by recounting your own experiences of how you felt in happy or sad moments; that way you will open the door to communication.

Put into practice 

Face your child in different situations to discover the origin. For example: give her a difficult task for her age and see how she copes with challenges; Take him to places where he can play with different children of different ages to see how he relates, among other things.

4 Be empathetic

Teaching children to understand what others feel is a way of being empathetic and with this you will make them feel accepted, and at the same time they will strengthen their values. Focus on teaching the sensitivity and pain of others and how to help.

Put into practice 

It is recommended to carry out humanitarian actions, such as adopting street animals, helping people in need, visiting an institution where volunteers are required. Even helping grandparents with household chores.

5 By example

Do you know how to control your emotions? Does your child see how you act when you feel frustrated? The simplest way to help children control their emotions is by developing self-control in ourselves.

Remember that children learn by imitating the actions of their parents; For this reason, it is essential that you learn to control yourself and thus teach by example.

Put into practice 

In this case, you must explain that every action has consequences. For example, if your child is angry because someone treated him badly, help him reason about the negative of revenge. Together with your child, reflect and find different alternatives to solve conflicts, such as communication, calming down, breathing counting to ten and above all the value of forgiveness.

The importance of emotional intelligence goes beyond having a good behavior, it is about facing problems, having empathy with others, motivating ourselves, controlling impulses, regulating moods. It even helps us make decisions.

Teach your children to control their emotions, as this will give you peace of mind, knowing that they will be able to face obstacles and problems in life on their own.

Add a Comment

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *