Ma’am, Please Don’t Do Your Son’s Homework!

If doing homework is a frustrating time for you and your child, or you end up threatening, punishing, or worse, doing homework so the teacher doesn’t annoy you, review your way of helping your child. Ma’am, please don’t

Imagine a mother sitting with her child doing homework. There are books arranged all over the table, fresh water in a glass, the room very well lit, without distractions, a good aroma floats in the atmosphere: this could be a beautiful image. But the child is crying and the mother is frowning, upset and has already begun to scream … It is no longer such a pleasant image to see as it was at the beginning, much less to live every day at home. When situations like this are repeated too often, they generate problems such as poor school performance, teenage dropouts, truncated careers and deteriorated and damaged family relationships, in the worst case. So what can you do?

If more than three times a week when doing homework (homework) you have problems such as:

  • The child does not want to do his homework.

  • He only does it if you threaten, punish or bribe him (that’s what actually happens when you offer him gifts in exchange for him to do it).

  • He does it poorly, of poor quality and with poor presentation.

  • He is unable to do it alone.

  • The worst of the case is that it does not advance or advances only sheets in books and notebooks, but does not learn.

Children’s school performance, or how the mother becomes a teacher

We must seriously review the following to rule out simple problems and get to the source of the problem:

1. The environment

There should be no distractions, even you and your cell phone can distract him; television, radio, strident music, people constantly passing by; In addition, the climate must be pleasant, well lit and optimal for the child to concentrate and fulfill her duty.

2. Your mood or emotional state

If you are upset about something better, water the plants and when you feel better, come back. Don’t do homework by scolding, spanking, or “smacking” the child.

3. Appropriate schedules and routines

The homework schedule should be grounded in a good routine; for example: your child comes home, eats, rests, and then does homework. Right away he plays, dines, bathes, reads a story, and sleeps. Never stir or change schedules, or one day yes and four no. The routine gives you consistency and security, and after a while it forms a habit.

I invite you to read: Make me tell you everything! Four questions for your child’s teacher

If all this is in order, let’s review the next level:

A. Dosed schoolwork and homework

It is necessary that, with a good critical eye and not as a mother, you check that the tasks that your child must do are in accordance with his age, academic degree and mainly, with his capacity and learning pace. Verify that the task is congruent with the textbook, with the notes that your child makes in class, ask him about what he is learning in the classroom, how he feels and if you have doubts, go directly to the school with the intention of expressing your concerns with the group teacher; they will surely establish strategies to support the child. We all know how reckless it is to compare children, but from time to time he watches his classmates – I repeat, with a critical eye, not Mom’s – he checks whether motor progress, intellectual development and language are more or less similar between classmates , or if your child does not relate or is slower than the rest of the group; then talk to the teacher again and work on the recommendations she makes.

B. Dishonesty doesn’t solve problems, it complicates them

There are mothers who, after being frustrated and emotionally exhausted because their child cannot do homework, make the worst mistake of all: doing it themselves and hoping that the teacher does not realize it. Here are favorable: a) The mistake of teaching your child to be dishonest; b) That you solve his problems and that he should not face its consequences; c) You do not allow the teacher to detect problems in your child’s learning. Oh, and it is equally bad that through your carelessness, the children have not done the homework and you do it or make them lie about why they did not do it. If your child can’t do homework or makes too many mistakes, send it to school like this and explain to the teacher that this is the reality of your child, and together see how to help him appropriately.

C. Bad teaching practice

It is also necessary to say that some teachers have bad teaching practice; that is, they commission excessive, inappropriate tasks or tasks beyond the children’s ability, so that parents are in dire need to intervene. Pedagogically, the task should be to reaffirm, practice and consolidate what was seen in class, and it should not take them all afternoon; kids must-can do it themselves and be enjoyable, never repetitive. Children should spend more time playing outside than indoors, sitting doing endless flat layouts.

D. Inadequate educational models

There are teachers who, pretending to train super competitive students, impose heavy burdens on their students, and it is wise to recognize that perhaps this educational system is not for your child.

E. Overprotective parents

Your child is more capable than you imagine, just allow him to develop, test himself and face the consequences of what he does; recognize what your child is and is not, what they can give and to what extent. Overprotecting it doesn’t help it, it hurts it; so please don’t do her homework!

In parenting, don’t make these mistakes

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