If you think that the first months of your relationship were the best, you have to read this.
Knowing and loving a person for a long time is really something very special, time makes sure that they know each other perfectly and that they adapt to each other to their way of being, the intonation with which they speak, and even body language. My husband met me when I was just nineteen years old; It didn’t take me long to fall in love with him and soon we were inseparable. Back then, and even more so on our wedding day, I swore there was no more love for him in my heart. Yet once again time taught me that I was wrong.
How much do you love your husband?
I think many of us have the idea that to know if we are well as a couple we have to compare the level of love we feel in the present with the one we felt when we first met, or the one we felt on the wedding day. This comparison, instead of helping us, can harm how we perceive our relationship, and what we feel towards our partner.
I would like to suggest that instead of thinking that we must be just as in love as in times past, the ideal is to feel even more love than when they met, and in a stable relationship this is totally true for the following reasons:
1. Time makes it sweeter
If there is something that time can do very well, with our help, it is to sweeten any relationship; This happens as a natural consequence of getting to know each other better, spending more time together, living together doing “mundane” activities such as cleaning the house and so on. None of this happens when we hardly know someone.
2. They go through difficult situations
If there is anything that helps solidify existing bonds of affection, it is the tests that this life gives us. When we do not have much time to be with someone, it is impossible for life to give us enough evidence to reach the level of love, commitment and friendship with your partner that is obtained when we have already gone through them.
3. Does not exclude children
Children offer the perfect opportunity to help a stable partner to strengthen the feelings of love that they already have for each other. The first months of knowing each other offer intensity of feeling, but this will never be compared with the intensity that is experienced when we have a baby in our arms that we know is a product of the love they have.
4. It is more stable
There is no doubt that the first months of any relationship are full of passion and intensity; However, this feeling fades as time passes and one may come to think that they no longer love each other as much as in the beginning: true relationships, those that last a lifetime, are characterized by having moments of passion with the majority of time feeling a stable love. That is, most of the time love is not experienced with that intensity, and this is good, not bad.
I invite you to no longer think of the beginnings of your relationship as the best moments or as the measure with which you have to compare the level of love you have for your partner; Rather, think about how you can increase that love so that you can say, “I really love you more than when I met you.”