If you have discovered that your partner is lying, think twice before taking revenge. This is a better rematch.
Something that often happens in affective relationships is that you are the last to find out what your partner is secretly doing. It is logical that you feel full of anger, helplessness and of course betrayed. It hurts because you don’t expect it from who you love, anything but that.
Then you are assailed by the uncertainty of not knowing how to act, you want to complain and even leave their side due to deception, well, before doing so, I invite you to continue reading the best way to act when you discover that your spouse has lied to you.
1. Out with the hard feelings
Grudge is not a good counselor. If you allow it to take control of you, it will lead you to do things that you will later regret. By allowing yourself to be dominated by resentment, you will remember over and over the mistake your partner made, thus preventing you from overcoming it and moving on.
For your health before the peace of your home, take a deep breath, try to stay calm and think twice before acting.
2. Revenge should not be an option
It is the first thing that goes through your head, you think of the best way to make him pay for the bad drink that he has put you through. Well that is not the solution, at first it will seem like a great idea; However, if you carry out your revenge plans then you will realize that you have only managed to hurt your partner and that is not going to make you feel better.
Instead, remain the way you are, loyal and honest, not only will you show that you are valuable but it will make you feel satisfied with yourself for being able to do the right thing.
I invite you to read: 5 lies used by women that destroy marriage
3. Don’t judge
You can’t expect your spouse to be a true copy of who you are and act like you would, so repress the urge to blame your partner for all the problems in your relationship.
That reaction will be the result of how alert you are due to his lie, even so you must always keep in mind that a relationship is two and that if there are problems beyond lies it is because of both.
It is only fair that both make an effort to repair the bonds of trust in the relationship, being understanding and positive.
Forgiving a lie of the kind that involves loss of confidence is not a simple task at all, but it is not impossible either. Forgiving does not only imply the well-being of turning the page to an unpleasant event, it is also the sign of being humble and that you love yourself, therefore you do not give room to bad feelings.
The point is that you learn your lesson but don’t spend your life remembering the bitter taste of deception. Forgiving is a personal process that everyone carries out at their own pace. It requires patience, time, and acceptance of the facts.
5. Make an effort to regain trust in your partner
Like forgiving, regaining trust will take time. In addition, it is not only something that you must do, your partner must also do her part and with acts show that she deserves your trust.
At the same time that your partner is willing to regain your trust, be receptive to the samples of loyalty and honesty that your partner offers you.
6. Speak sincerely
Sincere communication is essential in all relationships, as it is a powerful tool that will allow both of you to put yourself in each other’s shoes, this will help you grow as a couple and as individuals.
It is logical that you stop trusting your partner when you discover a lie, so a good way to regain confidence is to speak honestly on a constant basis, thus guaranteeing the partner that the same mistake will not be made again.
It is also fair that you recognize that each one must have their own space and it must be respected, this is so that each one preserves their individuality.
Read also: does your partner lie? Use these CIA tricks to find out
7. Be clear about whether or not you can trust your partner again.
I want to reiterate that overcoming a deception is a difficult task and that it can be very tempting to stop fighting to save the relationship; However, if you are reading this article, you want to do something to save your marriage.
If you both feel that you can move on, it is good that you know it and that you make an effort not to make the same mistakes again, not to lie again, and to be honest.
You can do it on your own or turn to a marriage counselor to help you deal with conflict.
Nobody has said that loving is an easy task without challenges, living as a couple is the challenge and you can fight with your love for the happiness of both.