Have you had difficulties with the changes in your life? Do you know what makes it difficult? Would you like to know how to go through a crisis with more elements?
We have heard the word crisis quite a bit, and you surely understand the concept. In any case, I would like to start by defining it, since we take it for granted that we are talking about the same thing, and it may not be so.
It comes from a Greek word that refers to a turning point, that is, a decisive moment. The point at which a path changes and takes a different course.
In life, there are many moments where life transforms. It is in these moments that we enter into crisis, since the known path disappears, and it is time to embark on new routes.
The homeostatic system
Human beings are a system, and so are families, communities, cities. We are all part of a system, and at the same time we are a system. Systems tend to find a way and make it stay in order to survive. This is defined as “homeostasis.”
A crisis threatens this way of survival, this flow of movement of a system needs to be modified. However, a system will always seek to remain in the known, in what it already knows works. This is why, in the face of a crisis, there is a lot of resistance to change.
Entropy can be defined as the measure of disorder in a system. This disorder is natural to some extent. All systems go into disorder, and their tendency to survive and function (homeostasis) brings them back into order.
In a crisis, the disorder is greater. And if we add the resistance to modifying the functioning of the system, disorder and chaos increases.
Faced with this paradigm, a crisis is that moment in which the system must modify its operation. Generate new strategies, resources, behaviors to survive. Paradoxically, what makes her live – her homeostasis – hinders the changes she requires to survive in the face of crises.
The psychic break before the crisis
In the face of greater resistance, there is a greater probability of breakage. Accepting reality is a fundamental part of change. It is this new reality that requires modifications to adapt. Finding yourself in a crisis is finding yourself facing the pain of losing what was previously what you were already qualified for.
For example, when you have a job, you already know how to handle yourself there, the rules, schedules, your tasks. When you lose it, there is first a resistance, a pain of losing what was known and that was the usual way to survive. Looking for a new job, and even starting another, requires new rules, new clothes, maybe new hours, and new tasks. New people to network with. It is relearning. It is to be vulnerable again on the adaptation curve.
Many of the difficulties faced with these crises is when our identity is mixed with what is lost. Going back to the previous example, many times when you lose a job, you don’t just lose an activity. Sometimes people identify with the company, with its values, even when saying who they are, they name that position they have. That is, they are no longer the person, they are that job.
It is for this reason that crises take greater strength, and difficulty in reorganizing. They not only rearrange their life, but their own personality structure and identity.
One of the fundamental elements to be able to overcome a crisis is the grieving process, being able to name the losses allows you to say goodbye to it, and leave the space available for new paths. Without saying goodbye to the before, it will be difficult for you to project and prepare the way for what the present and future demand of you. Express your pain, your sadness. Give your emotions space.
The new life
Being able to generate new resources is essential to face a crisis. Be willing to learn something new. Even a new personal image. Who do you want to be, what do you want to live in the new stage of life. Create new projects, new dreams, new ideas.
Some beliefs will be shaky. When that happens sometimes necessary accompaniment professional, since they are such – and beliefs that have to do much in the identity- which hinder further adaptation to change.
This new life is a new opportunity. That is why the concept of crisis is often related to opportunity. It is learning from the mistakes of before, and evaluating the past to improve the present and the construction of the future.
Crises always invite us to grow. Facing new realities always requires more of us. Not only on the subject of new learning and resources. Always giving up what we are used to in our life implies emotional growth and maturation.
Even a spiritual development, since existential questions come along with these crises. Being able to name them and seek to answer them will also generate personal enrichment. It will also require you to confidently accept that change, which even though you did not choose, opens up to you. Thousands of possibilities open up from it. Take your time to be able to choose your new path.
In summary, to overcome this crisis it is necessary to do the following steps:
1 Say goodbye: take space and time for your grief.
2 Evaluate the past life and consider what life you want to build.
3 Make space for the necessary learnings and the resources you will need.
4 Go one step at a time, a small goal in that transformation.
Give room for your spirituality.
The change is in your hands. With purpose and will you can achieve it.