If you believe that the responsibility of raising values is the school, discover the fine line between what you and the school must correct. Juvenile delinquency: the fine line between what parents can correct and what cannot.
One thing I agree with the teachers is that the children of a responsible family should be educated from home. The school is an institution that instills knowledge in various areas and, therefore, should not be responsible for disorders, mistakes, and even crimes committed by children, adolescents and young people.
This is a thorny issue, to be sure, but not addressing it does not make the problem less serious. Parents recognize that every day many unfortunate events occur in schools at the hands of students; These events range from the mockery and ridicule of a child who has been taken as a “scapegoat” by others, to threats to harm him, fights outside or on the school premises, robberies and many other serious offenses.
As if that were not enough, when a concerned father or mother wishes to correct a child who they themselves recognize has gotten out of their hands, the situation becomes untenable because that offspring can attack them or threaten to report them to government entities for abuse; sad, yes, but true.
The foregoing leads me to recall a recent story: a mother discovered that her son had stolen a smartphone; she presented him to the authorities, recognizing that she herself no longer knew what to do in this situation. The question that arises is the following: what is it that parents do wrong so that a child gets out of their hands and they have to go to the authorities? My answer is nothing or a lot.
Why nothing or a lot?
Nothing, because as my uncle once told me: “Children are raised, but not feelings.” Children can be given whatever is within the reach of the possibilities, they are reprimanded and corrected with “chancla” or affection and, only if they want, they CHOOSE the right path. And that is the heart of the matter: whenever a human being can choose, it is he and only him who must be held responsible for their actions and their consequences.
It assumes that children have the power to distinguish the good and the bad in life from the age of 8 (others younger); If to this is added that they have lived in an environment, good or bad depending on the case, that will be the example they have of life and it will also be what they contribute to society. It is true that many minors have gone through really horrible situations and are, in fact, the best human beings that could ever be known, but there are others who, although they have lived in exemplary homes, choose the most twisted path (case of some murderers in series) without parents being able to assume that their child is going to go down that kind of path.
This is when the answer to a lot comes: to give a child everything, without measure; fighting with the partner in front of them, not going to their call for help in the face of school bullying or where they live, not knowing what kind of friends they have and ignoring clearly disturbing behaviors without going to a psychiatrist who diagnoses a possible mental illness, they are triggers for your son to get out of your hands tomorrow and become a criminal.
Much has been said about it, but since what is learned well is not forgotten, here it goes again:
Pay attention to the type of friends he has, write down names, addresses, and even try to know his parents.
Address your children’s complaints about possible abuse, find out where it comes from and seek a solution.
Correct the child so as not to punish the adult. If you notice that something is not as good as it should be, see where your child is going wrong and correct her path.
read9 things you should never say to your child in an argument
- Set a good example by treating your partner well, and fixing their problems in private, that will be the example of home, father or mother and partner that you want to have.
readLoving your wife is the best gift you can give your children
Teaching you honesty
If he comes home with something that doesn’t belong to him, have him return it even if it means embarrassing him.