I write this article for those men, who still remain at home struggling between the desire to leave and the pain of leaving, I write it with the illusion of touching some fiber in their hearts that leads them to reflection.
One of the most difficult decisions a man faces is when he feels that the time has come to commit to marriage, and the next big decision he faces is when he decides to leave the home that he has built alongside a person whom ever loved, or maybe still loves. Although I have seen men leave their homes unceremoniously leaving their family, in most cases they fight a great internal battle.
I write this article for those men who still remain at home struggling between the desire to leave and the pain of leaving; I write it with the illusion of touching some fiber of your heart, seeking to achieve some point of reflection.
Let’s not talk about motives
When talking about motives, sometimes excuses are also found, everything can be overcome if there is love! I want to distance myself a little, in this note, from the reasons that lead a man to make the decision to abandon his family, which among others may be: another illusion, monotony, he probably feels that love for his wife is no longer the same, the incompatibility, the constant fights, the unforgiveness, etc. The reasons are as many as there are men, I just want you to stop for a moment and analyze if that barrier or that obstacle is stronger than what you have built next to a wife and children who love and need you.
Remember when you assumed before God the commitment of marriage, at the altar you promised to be with your wife in good times and in bad times, well this is a bad time! wife, children, they are not disposable, they are for life and even if you decide to leave them today and the life story that you have built with them they will always accompany you.
Take time and be honest always
I know closely several stories in which women suffer from constant uncertainty, faced with the insecurity generated by the possibility of a divorce. Men by their very nature tend to be introspective, they do not easily express their feelings, nor do they easily externalize their thoughts; women may label them selfish, but it is not always selfish; What I suggest is that you, as a husband, understand how difficult it is for your wife to decipher you, understand what is happening to you; If you are at this point, clarify your ideas, thoughts, feelings to the maximum and express them to your wife, I am sure that he will understand, do not leave him in that sea of fear and frustration, explain to him the.
If you need time to clarify your mind and your feelings, you can take it, but be consistent with what you ask, it is a time to reflect, to analyze, to understand your feelings. If, if applicable, you are involved in a relationship parallel to your marriage, it is convenient that you also distance yourself from that relationship so that you can be more objective when making decisions, I clarify this is not a guide for you to choose between your wife and another woman, I just contemplate it within the possibilities. If you have already made the decision and believe that there is no going back, please read this:
Love is a decision
Love is a decision, and it is that a marriage cannot be linked only to desire and passion as time passes these feelings wear out, but it is possible to recover them, just remember what you felt one day, you will see how that memory can be your lifeline, you can feel it again if you try hard, if you decide to.
Does not leave behind just a house
It is not about a move, it is about leaving behind dreams, desires, illusions and hopes, but especially his wife and children; Your children who have been your creation need you to grow, you are their example and role model, many men who leave their home later cannot overcome the indifference with which their children treat them, but they only reap what they have sown.
Seek God and take refuge in his word
The best way to achieve discernment, and the strength that is needed at this time, is prayer, pray with faith and trust in God.
Those who decide to leave always miss their home
There are so many stories that reflect this that I just wrote, I have come across men, family, friends, acquaintances who always remember with sadness and melancholy all that they left behind, the love and attentions of their wife, the love and company of their children, the motivation to get up and go to work in order to achieve the desired dreams, vacations, special celebrations. I ask you, why take all that out of your life? It’s your life! The one that you built and that you need to keep building every day! It is as if you have spent years working hard to build a beautiful ship and when it is ready to sail, you set it adrift. Fight, be brave!