I love my husband, but sometimes I feel that I do not show it the same to my son. Could it affect him?
Mariana is the mother of two boys, ages 8 and 10. From the moment she wakes up, all the attentions are for her husband: she prepares the water for him to bathe, puts his clothes perfectly ironed and arranged in bed so that he can dress, prepares breakfast to his liking and when he returns from work he leaves everything what she is doing to take care of him: she brings him his slippers, his robe and serves him his dinner. Instead, every day she gives her children cereal and a school lunch consisting of sweet bread and milk. As soon as she goes to school for them, she feeds them, sends them to do their homework and puts them to watch television the rest of the afternoon and before her husband comes home from work she serves them a glass of milk to send them to sleep. and avoid being “bothered” by their father.
Although Mariana does not ignore her children, she does show that for her her husband is above her children with his attitude and the lack of affectionate manifestations, the same that children have perceived throughout their young age.
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How do you destroy your children when you prefer your husband?
1) They become insecure
This is reflected in their attitudes since they will not trust anything or anyone, not even themselves, so making decisions is too difficult for them. Class participation, homework, project work… it is going to cost you a lot of work to do, as well as to realize your abilities.
2) they lack affection
If you don’t give your child affection, he won’t show it either for the simple reason that it was never shown to him, he never had a way to learn it. This deficiency can affect your character throughout your life, as well as in relating to other people.
3) Vulnerable to diseases
On the other hand, it can become more sensitive to diseases, according to the pediatrician at the Xanit International Hospital in Malaga, Spain, Dr. Antonio Muñoz “Affective deficiency influences the quality of the child’s defense mechanisms against infection.”
4) They feel abandoned
One of the fears that all children have, especially in the first years of their life, is feeling abandoned by their own parents, since this causes a great emptiness in their hearts that nothing, and no one can remedy.
5) Naughty kids
The fact that a little one makes mischief at a stage in his life is normal, but sometimes these can be done only to the mother, thereby seeking to get her attention.
6) Grudge against his father
Excessive attention by one parent to the other can cause the child to generate a certain resentment, which can last a lifetime increasing over the years, becoming irreversible.
7) childhood depression
If a child shows excessive and prolonged sadness, it is because he is depressed and it can be perceived when he shows irritability, no participation in school activities, lack of concentration, sleep variations, (he sleeps a lot or does not sleep) or the fact that he separate from others.
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8) Low self-esteem
When children lack affection in the family, they do not believe in them from childhood to adulthood and tend to feel alien to their own family, not accepted, so sooner or later they may seek to cover these deficiencies in another area.
Children are very persuasive about the details and affection that parents show them. That is why it is very important not to lose sight of this situation since it can affect them not only during their childhood but for their whole life. Affection is essential in a family, without showing preferences with your husband and much less with your children.