There may be a lot of love, but if they start to behave in this way, the relationship will fall apart.
We all want to live a life as a couple full of happiness and harmony, where love reigns forever; However, sometimes it is complicated because we all think and are different, so it is totally normal to have some disagreements. But when these marital conflicts are frequent and do not allow for reconciliation, to the extent of damaging your integrity, dignity and physical health, it is a totally toxic relationship.
There are people who, even though they are united by love, family or any other circumstance, can be harmful. As my father used to say “There is no worse blind than the one who does not want to see” ; which means that despite the pain and suffering that a person causes to his partner, it is impossible for him to break that emotional bond, letting his life pass, thinking that one day they will change.
The doctor of psychology Walter Riso affirms that it will be useless to wish the couple to change completely, since their personality, identity and education are deeply ingrained from childhood. It may be that a person modifies some habits or customs to improve coexistence, but we should never wait for it to change as we want, since we would be destroying the essence and authenticity that makes us unique and special.
Why do we hurt who we love?
Nobody commits thinking or wanting to harm their partner, since love is the feeling that strengthens them day by day. But unconsciously we make mistakes, hurting those we love the most.
That is why I share with you these personality types, which harm your partner, so that you can identify them and thus be able to fix your relationship.
1 The one who never makes decisions
Either out of fear of making mistakes or damaging family stability, this person never makes decisions, no matter how simple they are. Your world will rotate depending on what others want to do or not, in this case your partner. This behavior, in some situations, will make the spouse feel empowered, strong and indispensable; without realizing the great weight that falls on their shoulders.
But why can it harm you? Simply because they are a couple who have to make decisions together, since in case the spouse makes a mistake, all the blame will be theirs, generating feelings of frustration, hatred and repulsion. For this reason, it will be important to get involved in all decisions and not let only one of you make them.
2 The impulsive
At this point the opposite is true; as explainedSigmund Freud ,impulsivity is the force that the id has over the ego and the superego . That is to say,
They do not tolerate waiting, they are impatient, they usually put responsibilities and obligations aside, they are prone to anger and generate unnecessary conflicts, believing that they are absolutely right in everything.
Sometimes they regret when things have gotten out of control, however, they continue with the same behaviors over and over again, damaging the physical and emotional stability of the couple.
3 The One Who Controls Everything
They are people who always fight for what they think and feel that they are never wrong, they will always extend their point of view convincing anyone that what they decide is the best, regardless of the opinion of their partner. Sometimes they are blackmailers, causing their spouse to act submissively.
You may listen to the opinions of your partner, but you will always end up doing what he or she decides. Sometimes this behavior is not visibly harmful, but over time it can harm the other, hurting their self-esteem, security and confidence.
4 The infidels
Not only the infidelityIt is having an extramarital affair, but you can become unfaithful in other ways; for example: having intimate thoughts with another person without actually having physical contact, whether virtual or not; or being unfaithful in an affective way, which refers to creating a strong emotional bond with someone other than the partner, among others.
All infidelity damages the spouse, the family, the loved ones, friends and all the people that surround the couple. Here at this point, it would be convenient to evaluate the relationship and accept the part of guilt; On many occasions, forgiveness and repentance lead to saving the relationship.
5 The unrealists
In every marital relationship there must be a balance, when it is lacking it is logical that the relationship will collapse. When a person is too optimistic without being realistic, it is possible that marital conflicts are generated, since he will not be able to see the consequences of each decision.
It is good to be positive, to act in favor of each situation, finding an apprenticeship to adversity, however the problem can harm the couple when you do not act and only think.
6 Those who do not accept their responsibility
One of the characteristics that make marriage a success is not neglecting the role that each one has to play to achieve family stability. When the couple begins to be irresponsible with their obligations, it is logical that it damages and hurts the relationship.
Remember that you are a couple who have to work together to find happiness, achieve goals and dreams together; otherwise it will be almost impossible to have a strong and successful marriage.
These personalities or behaviors mentioned above are harmful to the marriage; therefore it is advisable to start communicating as a couple, thus finding solutions to problems; It is even valid to ask for help from a specialist in the field. Keep in mind that in every relationship there are conflicts, which is normal; However, prevent certain attitudes from damaging your integrity as a person.