If the wife earns more than her husband, does she rule at home? Does she have to make the family’s decisions? Does the husband have to obey? This article will clarify your doubts and above all it will help you solve the dilemma.
More and more successful women entrepreneurs and entrepreneurs. Little by little we have been placing ourselves in executive and decision-making positions in all types of companies. Not without much work behind it, everything seems to be going very well for women to continue studying, working and progressing without their gender being an impediment to excel and succeed in productive life. Everything is fine except when I get home.
Currently, many of these working women earn more money than their husbands or hold leadership positions that do not seem to excite him but do come to uncomfortable or upset him, to the extent that some families are falling apart over this cause.
What is the outlook? Four factors
1. Professional jealousy
Getting fully involved in work, doing our best, and failing to move forward as quickly or in the way we would like can happen to all of us and it becomes frustrating and discouraging. The situation worsens when we see that others do achieve what we do not, and then jealousy, envy and other bad feelings appear.
Now imagine those feelings in a couple where the woman is the one who is achieving success and the husband is not.
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2. Wounded pride
For men it is very important to be able to feel strong, be the protector of the family and provide what is necessary for everyone. Therefore, losing your job, not earning enough, or having these responsibilities fall on your wife is quite difficult to accept and understand. It can be embarrassing for a man to even think that his wife “supports him.”
The situation is aggravated when the wife moves with pride, arrogance and constantly emphasizes that she is the one who earns the money, that she is the only one capable and, therefore, better and with greater rights.
3. Fear of women
As strange as it may seem to some, in Latin American culture it is still inconceivable that a woman could lead, guide or command a male team. There are still men who are offended by having a boss, a director, or simply taking orders from a woman. But deep down, it is nothing more than fear of being displaced or diminished in his masculinity.
Unfortunately, there are men who fear strong women and seek to relate to those they can dominate.
Nor is it acceptable that, knowing this, a woman abuses a man. Does it sound strange? Well, it is happening and it does a lot, a lot of damage.
4. Misconception of family leadership
In many marriages, both men and women have misinterpreted the idea of family leadership by thinking that the one who earns the most is the one who has the right to “command the house” and be served by others who earn less or nothing. Leadership in marriage, on the contrary, implies service, the greatest is the greatest servant of all and has nothing to do with money.
Husbands fight to see who is boss, who is right, who dominates whom, and in their struggle they lose the most valuable thing: their children and their relationship itself.
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How to solve it? Three actions and tips
1. Agreements for all
“In this house we all work for the common good.” It doesn’t matter who earns how much, everything goes to the same end: the family.
Make agreements, divide expenses, or more simply: collect all the income and from there begin to manage your money. There is no “yours” or “mine”, but “ours.”
2. Shared assets, expenses, tasks and responsibilities
Working together, serving each other, helping, having responsibilities and collaborating, are principles that put us on the same level and keep us free of pride.
3. Humility, antidote
There is no better antidote to pride than humility: humility to receive and humility to give. Today the wife may be the one who supports the home, but tomorrow it will be the husband or someone else; humility not to boast of our achievements and triumphs, of our income and intelligence. Humility to receive with joy. Humility to know that all good we have is not because of our work, but because of the power of God.
Avoid useless fights, enjoy the abundance of life, and you and yours are grateful and generous, because that is what makes a family rich.